My cousin passed yesterday. Once you get over the initial shock of the reality that you will never see this person again and after you have ran the last conversation or encounter with them though your mind, you begin to think about all of your family members that you have neglected to call. Then begin the remarks at how sad it is that families wait until a tragedy to get together. How they should stay n contact with each other more, see each other more...As I began to go through my own list of friends and family I love dearly, would do anything for, even though I may not talk to or see regularly, I began to realize something that I would like to share.

Everyday we are bombarded, in one for or another, with the idea that tomorrow will come. We plan for retirement. During heartache we are told to take it "day by day" or "there is always tomorrow". We encourage people to set goals, plan and look forward to the future as we remind them it is always darkest before the storm because the sun always rises in the morning. We teach our youth to plan for careers they do not even know they want yet so they can provide for the children they may never have.

You see, we are not planning for death. We are planning for life. So when death arrives and we suffer a loss, it serve as a reminder that we are living....to die. It makes us reevaluate our goals, our life and the direction of it. So, it is alright if the loss of a loved one provokes an impromptu family gathering with those you have not seen in ten years. Do not look at it as a half hearted attempt to make things right for that moment or as a way for family members to rid themselves of potential guilt. Look at it as reminder that we need to constantly reevaluate what we are doing with our own lives as we continue to plan for the future. A reminder to embrace who we are and where we come from and to include those who contribute to it...in it.

While we are thinking of places we want to go to, things we want to do and family we want to see, we do not typical think that time is limited. Theirs or ours. After all, we are conditioned to be hopeful because we have tomorrow. And that's why a loss prompts the realization, even through all of the inspirational quotes, that your grandmother was right....tomorrow is not promised. It is sad that you lost someone. It is not sad that it caused you to make the call. Set the date. Send the text.......answer one.

Tomorrow is not promised, but it is okay if we need a reminder as we prepared for it to come. Live.

Blessings, Jai